Every morn, every noon, and then at night, a steady stream of thoughts, memories and sensations run through me.
Each one exhilirates me, gets my brain to send a flash down to somewhere in my body, causes a little smile to appear on my lips.
Happiness flows through me, excitement engulfs me and my day brightens up, every time.
The grey of the sky, the streets and the world around spins out, flashing brightly
A symphony in the colours of the rainbow shimmer over the pavements, buildings and the cars.
A lightness comes over me, others around me seem to look at me, they notice it too perhaps.
This joy, this happiness within me comes from somewhere within me.
Searching for it, I look inside me, I look at what's around me.
It's somewhere under my skin that I find the source.
Its name, its purpose and place in my life is hard to reveal, sometimes hard to believe.
Though I was there, consciously and aware, I feel like I dreamt it all, sometimes.
Though I wanted it, looked for it and it happened, I feel like I dreamt it all, sometimes.
It dawned on me only today that that something had gotten under my skin.
What a wonderful revelation, yet freightening to find.
Not a freight of the full scale, perhaps better described as a little trepidation at my vulnerability.
Under my skin is as close as it gets...
5th March 2004